Shout out

I think I am beginning to find some rhythm and fun in all this. Today, Bruno and I decided to go on an outing to Napa. Our doctors had said that a drive of that distance would be fine, and since we anticipate an ever closing ring of movement, we decided to try getting out while the getting was good.

We were both pretty grouchy wrecks this morning, nervous that somehow something would go wrong. Bruno shouted a bit about, hmmm...I don't know what he was shouting about, and I changed outfits a few times, desperately trying to imagine clothes I could wear over my ballooning body for a whole day out and not want to tear off after a few hours. But eventually Bruno shouted out whatever nerves he needed to get out, and I packed a bag of alternative outfits, along with lunch, water, second lunch and a book, and we made it out of the house. And we only had to double back once, to pick up the bag which I left on the kitchen counter: pregnancy brain is sort of at the level of cow consciousness.

But then, really, we were off, and we started to relax a little and enjoy life. The California rain stopped and I was able to take in the beautiful green rolling hills, and the vineyards filled with yellow flowers: it's mustard season in Napa. We ate lunch as we drove, and even stopped in Petaluma on the way where Bruno let me trade in my 20 minute walk for 30 minutes on my feet trying on clothes at the Motherhood Maternity outlet. (I got a fetching red dress for $20 that floats effortlessly over my bubble belly, impinging no part of my body: bliss!) Then I sat like a queen on a series of chairs and fitting room benches declaring Yea or Nay while Bruno modeled various renditions of male work clothes. A lovely drive through more Napa scenery while I ate second lunch, another sit at the coffee and cupcake cafe (of course) and then an early dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, Ubuntu, a bio-dynamic vegetarian place with first-rate food all from things grown either in their own gardens or locally by other gardeners. On our drive home, I reclined the passenger seat all the way down, turned on the tushie warmer, and napped the whole way.

And here I am, having spent 9 hours out of the house (but only 45 minutes total on my feet), and I'M NOT FREAKING OUT!! I know it is too much to hope that I've turned this emotional corner for good, but I'm going to shout out my gratitude for this new found peace and happiness for as long as it lasts!!